Hello everyone, I’m Zhang Xiaxin. It’s finally the weekend. After a busy week, I need to think and summarize a lot.
A few days ago, when I talked with my friends about self-control, they all said, “Wow, your self-control is so strong. You have been writing your blog for three or four years, and your official account is running so well. There are so many fans giving you points every day.
Hear these words of praise I slightly smile very indifferent, but in the heart has been laughing flower ha ha.
Thousand wear thousand wear ass do not wear, the ancients honestly do not deceive me. Such modest and prudent people can’t help but be flattered by such words, let alone ordinary people.
After laughing, IN fact, I am still a little embarrassed, ask myself, I am not in fact strong self-control of the people.
Working days are ok, time is fragmentary, but also can read a book what; On weekends, faced with various temptations such as housework, movies, games and Douyin, I have no intention to study and often fail to set up a flag.
It doesn’t matter if you are single and have a good family. Happiness is the most important thing. But I have a girlfriend and a mediocre family. If I want to be happy, I have to work hard.
Although the brain know should work hard, but the body, willpower is too lazy, the brain of the two villains fighting results are often lazy to win.
In order to have a better future, I have mainly done the following things to adjust myself in recent years:
- Look for the good in things
- Go for a positive environment
- More things you have to do
- Find a partner
People with poor self-control should have an eye for good
Our motivation to do something often comes from two aspects: internal drive and external drive.
Internal-drive is what we want to do; Out-drive means we have to do it.
The reasons why we want to do something vary from the pleasure of doing it to the satisfaction of finishing it. We prefer to do things that give us quick feedback, like playing games or watching videos, rather than things that seem unresponsive in the short term, like writing articles.
One way to make yourself want to do something is to give yourself a reason to do it.
For example, WHEN I was writing this article, I was very upset in the center, and the voice kept saying, “No more writing, let’s play some games” and “No more writing, let’s watch some videos”. However, I was able to keep writing because I kept reminding myself of the following benefits of writing this article:
- Can sum up the next recent thinking, confused in the future can review
- To the public number can let the reader harvest, the reader is happy and then a little bit of advertising, win-win
By giving yourself a mental cue to feel that doing something has such value, you increase your drive and shut yourself out of giving up.
You can also try telling yourself that working hard is not only about getting a raise, but also about improving your skills. Ability enhancement is not only for salary increase, but also for broader vision; Raising your horizon is not only about making money, but also about having more opportunities; There are more opportunities not just for making money, but for having a different experience in life.
Money is mentioned several times because many people are only interested in money these days. I hope our life can have more experience and happiness. But for lack of a better reason, try doing something for money.
People with low self-control need to be in a positive environment
If you have the inner drive and the body is still unable to keep up with it, try to start with the outer drive as mentioned in the previous section.
I remember in high school biology: “gene + environment = trait”.
Environment is the main external drive. Many parents spend a lot of money to send their children to good schools and intensive classes just to provide a good environment for their children.
When we go out into the society, we should try to find a positive environment for ourselves, whether we work or study.
When your environment doesn’t allow you to learn and improve, instead of pandering to it, it’s time to move on and choose a more positive environment.
When choosing a job, in addition to the salary, we should pay more attention to the department, the company’s atmosphere, whether it is conducive to our growth; When renting a house, pay attention to whether there are supermarkets, squares and other noisy environment around; It’s better to go to the library to see how many people are learning and growing every day.
Your environment affects your future!
People with poor self-control have more things they have to do
As the saying goes, the best way to get over a wall is to throw your hat.
Now popular all sorts of punch card software, a lot of them need to charge a sum of money now, missed punch card is fined money. Same idea.
If it’s something you want to do but don’t have the willpower to do, make it something you have to do and increase the external pressure.
If there is no perseverance to learn, find a few friends about the learning cycle, violation of the red envelope; If you don’t have the willpower to write, do what I did and go to GitChat and raise a flag. If you don’t have the willpower to work out, invest in a gym.
The things that have to be done are usually done.
People with poor self-control need a good partner
Finally, this is very, very important. I can persist in doing some things largely thanks to my girlfriend’s urging.
A good partner can not only cheer you up, but also point out your problems and help you put your life in perspective.
I am a lazy and shortsighted person, often fetters in front of some trifles, fortunately, small meat with her wisdom of life beat me, I am very grateful.
Another benefit of having a partner: you need to think about the future.
Although will be confused, will be at a loss, as long as you start to think and work hard, sooner or later there will be a realization of the day is not it.
Find a partner (regardless of gender) and give yourself a dream.
conclusion
Originally want to casually say, but export into a chapter to write a big article, I hope this article and I self-control poor friends have a little help, welcome message exchange oh!
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